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lordalfredhenry said in June 29th, 2006 at 0:49

One thing about being mute and a few autistics I know. A few of the mute ones can speak and do speak on rare occasions but often at great discomfort…so practically, they don’t. Imagining here if you will the feeling of having your head wrapped with rubber bands so that opening the jaw created enormous efforts, the tongue feeling pain from lifting to touch the teeth etc etc. Then, when the voice comes out, it would be like a screech. Yes, there are things about my *self* that I’m sensitive to. I’m sensitive sometimes to the sound of my own voice! Few would understand that one though. They’d say, “How could you not like your own voice?! How could it possibly harm you???”. I think I can tell you about this because even though your experience may be different, you’d be open enough to seeing what I’m trying to relate here without passing much judgement about whether or not it was ridiculous since in my world….there seems to be a set of possibilities that I see that others do not. They might want to say it’s “outside the box” in both bad or good connotations. (much of the time, it’s a euphemistic hint to others that “hey, he’s going ‘out there’ again”) Some of it is followed up with “Focus John! Focus Fo-CUS!”. I’m so very very distressed by colleagues. The so-called polite adult business world with it’s ethics and tolerance. It’s tolerant if it’s stereotypical. I can get away with it if I start speaking with a nasal slurring tone that isn’t too drunk sounding….because that fits their preconceptions.

I have to say, some of the descriptions seemed to be a bit concessionary on the NPR segment but I really enjoyed hearing your speech synthesizer. I’ve been using Joel’s J++ tool and my IM a bit more. Message boards seem easiest for me though. Tree structures give me some structure that I need. I really related to Michael’s experiencing discovery (brought tears actually) and it was neat to hear Jim’s voice. I’ve never been to Autreat but I keep wanting to go. I have too many excuses in some ways. I know I’m too late again this year. I’ve just got to save and also get the time off and away. (do they accept crashers who don’t mind getting a room off campus at the local inns?)

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Kirayoshi said in June 29th, 2006 at 2:53

My first encounters with fellow autistics was when I started posting at alt.support.autism where I met you, Joel, Kalen and at least a couple of hundred other autistics in all the years I was a regular poster there. We all were different people with different opinions but I had certainly the impression that we all stood for one thing, being autistic is the way we are, it’s not a disease and therefore it can’t be cured. Excepting people’s autism, without mentioning that it’s the greatest thing there is, is a way to show respect. In my humble opinion, saying that autistics should be cured is the same as saying autistics aren’t worth living.

After years of being a regular at that newsgroup, many people stayed away and eventually I left too and moved on. But when I visited other online places, I met autistic people who had different opinions, people who divided autistics between “elite-autistics” on the one side, who in their opinion are of high value for society because of their computer or other skills and on the other hand “retarted-autistics” who should be cured.

At first I was shocked reading these kind of opinions, I knew they existed but I had not heard these opinions of autistics themselves. Later I read more things that made me unhappy, for instance autistic people who claimed that their opinions should be considered more valuable because they were diagnosed before “Asperger Syndrome” became well known and doubted that a lot of autistics are truly autistic and use the label just to seek excuses.

Well, the first shock is over, now I’m merely heavily disappointed. I wrote five years ago my life story and published that on my website. Everything on that site is about “me” because I didn’t want to make the mistake to talk in other people’s place. But later I made one exception when I wrote a page that was called “We don’t want to be cured!” and I wrote that page out of respect for all autistics because I was convinced that we all thought the same about that one thing, a cure. Last week I changed the page to “I don’t want to be cured!”, merely changing all we’s in I’s because I understood I cannot speak for all, which made me sad.

Nevertheless, I know a lot of autistics and also non-autistics accepting autistics the way they are, opposing a cure and I hope you will never get too disappointed because I appriciate all the work you do.

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ballastexistenz said in June 29th, 2006 at 17:58

lordalfredhenry: That is part of my problem with speech, which is pretty multifaceted. It’s incredibly uncomfortable, it makes my throat and ears hurt for ages afterwards if I make noise, that’s why I even suppress my vocal tics where I can. There’s other parts too, many other parts, but that’s one part.

Kirayoshi: Yes, not all autistics don’t want a cure. I know many who do, all over the “spectrum”. But there’s, yes, a large number of us who don’t want a cure, and I suspect if society were structured differently, wanting a cure would be a very odd thing indeed for an autistic person. I’m aiming for that future society. :-)

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Ettina said in June 29th, 2006 at 19:27

I think “functioning level” as I use it sometimes relates to speech, but sometimes more to things like how well the person does at things like going to the bathroom when they need to, eating and drinking when they need to, and things like that. Those can be far more unpleasant, if you lack the needed support, than not being able to speak.
Another thing I wonder - people talk about high functioning and low functioing - I’ve never heard anyone talk about medium functioning. It’s treated like a clear dividing line.
And another thing - autism is treated like a line from least autistic to most autistic. I knew a 14 year old (he’s now be 15 or 16) who very occasionally said “eat” or his name, nothing else (so occasionally, I never heard him do so, but I was told he did by someone who knew him better than I did). He signed a few words, mostly with prompting. His major way of communicating was to grunt and point. He was also quite social, often showing people things he was interested in (such as campers) and made a lot of effort to communicate.
I also knew an 8 year old who could speak in full sentences, a lot of it echoed, sometimes used to communicate (like saying “no” while refusing to do something) who seemed quite aloof. If he saw something that interested him (such as shiny ribbon), he’d play with it and ignore us. He often came up to people and sat on their laps or hugged them, but without looking at them or trying to communicate.
The older boy I’d say is more disabled in speech, but socially less autistic than the younger boy. If I had to put them on a line from most to least autistic, whoever scored most autistic would depend on how important speech measures were compared to social measures.
PS: I liked both boys equally, and don’t think either needs curing - although I hope both, especially the older one, eventually find more success in communicating, so they can tell people what they are thinking.

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Baba Yaga said in June 30th, 2006 at 15:28

I don’t believe in the way the rest of the world divides us up into functioning levels, that is too simplistic and assumes there’s only one dimension to being autistic,

The assumption is prevalent, so far as I can tell, that there’s only one dimension to being human.

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ballastexistenz said in July 2nd, 2006 at 17:51

Ettina: I’ve heard the term “mid-functioning” at times before.

I’ve even had people (casually) try to refer to me that way by basically averaging out my typing skills with everything else, or something. Still seems weird.

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Elana Connor said in October 24th, 2007 at 4:11

THANKS

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